what’s not said
“I have never been hurt by
what I have not said.” — Calvin Coolidge
(nor has what’s not said ever helped
or been helpful.. share kind truths)
“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch,
a smile, a kind word, a listening ear,
an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring;
all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” — Leo Buscaglia
Paying someone a sincere compliment is a great way to build a relationship or begin a conversation. It makes the other person feel important and acknowledges their uniqueness. We all need to feel this. We all like to hear complimentary comments to help reinforce our self-image.
A compliment costs you nothing to give and can be the most rewarding gift you can give to another human being. There’s a wonderful story from one of the old time sales trainers, Willie Gale, who was speaking about compliments to a group of salesmen back in the 1950s.
One of the men of the group, a door-to-door salesman, asked Willie what he would do if he rang the doorbell and the woman who answered was all disheveled, dressed in a housecoat, looking absolutely awful. (Remember, this was the 1950s.) Willie responded, “I would just stand there and keep looking until I found something to compliment her on.”
A compliment must be sincere. People see right through false ones and ones without sincerity. Many a clothing sales person lost a sale by telling me something looked good on me when I knew instinctively it did not.
Make a habit of freely offering sincere compliments to people you encounter. This is so important, especially in our hurried, harried and seemingly impersonal society. There will be times when the compliment a person receives from you, a total stranger, is the only nice comment they hear that day. You can make a person’s day with a simple nicety, spoken with caring and sincerity.
~Jim Donovan, “Compliment Others Freely”
“Before you speak, ask yourself, is it kind, is it necessary, is it true, does it improve on the silence?” — Sai Baba
I feel the above quote to be so well stated that it is hard for me to add anything to it that could clarify on its wisdom. So this shall be short and brief. When tempted to fill the silence with words, please consider the question above carefully before you speak. Make sure what you are saying is kind. Be certain that it is something that absolutely needs to be said. Verify that what you are about to say is in fact true and not just a hasty judgment or ego-driven opinion. And finally, assure yourself that it will improve the situation or be helpful to someone or something.
~Rose-Anne Kumpunen, “Does it improve on the silence?”
THINK before you speak:
True Helpful Inspiring Necessary Kind
Triple ta, Dorian aka coffeesister |_|)
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